Are you delusional enough to make it??

I wanted to create, but I didn’t know what to create.

Struggles of a girl with more hobbies and interests than you can count on your two hands.

Why is it that I struggle to commit to one thing?

My brother believes I am on the autism spectrum.

Hell, I believe I am on the spectrum.

It just makes so much sense.

He had me take a test filled with questions to analyze whether or not there was a possibility I had autism.

The chances are high.

Social interactions are tricky for me.

Changing my pre-set plans I created in my head and have rehearsed over and over again?

Tricky for me.

And it also comes with an extra side of anger and frustration from me.

Sorry to the people closest to me who have witnessed this.

Picking one thing and sticking to it is tricky for me.

I choose to fully obsess and dig deep down on one hyper-specific thing for a long time and then forget about it until three years later.

This can be a wild ride when you decided on a whim two years ago that you wanted to create and lead an online business.

If I truly could look into a crystal ball and have seen two years ahead from the moment I started my business, I wonder if I still would have chosen to walk this path.

I think I would have.

You have got to be a little delusional and have a shit ton of patience to build a business from absolutely nothing.

And to stick with it when your entire family thinks you’re a joke, and the amount of hours you’ve put into it doesn’t even come close to the amount of money you’ve made?

Look, I wish I was telling you I’m making $10,000 each minute…

but I’m talking the other way around.

Crazy.

Despite all the unappreciated and completely unnoticed work I do behind the scenes—while also mothering a toddler, following my passions, having me time, keeping my relationship alive, and healing and doing the inner work—

I will never give up.

I can’t give up.

I was called to this work for a reason.

I know I was.

So when I showed up to my live masterclass that I spent hours creating and the Zoom room was entirely empty…

I showed up anyway.

I spoke and taught the class as if there were 100 people cheering me on.

Did it hurt?

Yeah, honestly, it did.

Am I going to stop?

No.

If anything, this moment just fueled the fire.

The fire to learn, to grow, to become even more me, to keep moving, experimenting, and expanding.

4:44 on the clock.

The number of balance and building stable foundations.

I decided to look and see if any significant astrological transits were taking place when my masterclass happened.

And yes, of course they were.

The most significant?

Chiron over my Saturn in Aries in the second house.

Of course.

The wounded healer coming up against the planet of discipline, structure, and karma—in my house of money.

All in the sign of Aries, which is big, bold leadership energy.

This transit points to healing the way I assert myself as a leader, especially in regards to money.

Phew.

Talk about a big lesson to be learned.